When Letting Go Becomes the Bravest Choice
- Beth Caldwell
- 4 days ago
- 3 min read
Love should never be so hard, and sometimes
letting go is the bravest choice we can make.
Author’s Note: A personal story about love, loss, worthiness, and the moment I finally chose peace.
Have you ever stayed in a job—or a relationship—long past its expiration date?
I’ve done that a few times.
I don’t usually talk about this part of my story, but today I feel called to share.
I recently went through a long and painful breakup. It was never part of my plan. I truly believed I had found my forever soulmate. And for nearly twenty years, it was absolute adoration—on both sides.
Then one spring, things began to change.
I used to be cute and irresistible.
Suddenly, I was annoying.
He was in a bad mood all the time.
This man had always been a gentleman—a door-holder, thoughtful, chivalrous. But that version of him seemed to be disappearing, and it didn’t make sense.
I remember coming home from a Sunday grocery trip, something we always enjoyed together. He didn’t open my car door, didn’t hold the front door, and when we got to the apartment steps, he walked inside, and the door shut in my face. Last week, he was saying, "Go make your tea, I'll carry the groceries." Now, I'm standing in the hallway, arms filled with grocery bags, and a door has just been shut in my face.
I was stunned. Crushed. Hurt.
And more than anything, confused.
We talked. He said it was stress at work. Since we’d been together so long, I decided to give the relationship six months before leaving. I believed he, we, were worth fighting for.
Things got better for a while… then slipped again. We’d talk, he’d promise, I’d hope.
"Six more months", I said to myself. We are worth it.
That cycle repeated itself several times before the relationship finally ended.
For a long time, I thought strength meant staying in a relationship that had quietly run its course. That if I just loved harder, tried more, forgave faster, it would somehow go back to the way it once was.
But love doesn’t work like that.
One of the hardest lessons I’ve ever learned is this: not all relationships are meant to be lifelong.
Even the ones that feel like they should be.
Even the ones you wanted more than anything to keep.
That truth broke my heart.
What I know now is that peace begins when you stop trying to hold together something that was never meant to last, and start believing you deserve ease, respect, and kindness.
When the relationship finally ended, it still took me more than six months to untangle everything—make choices, close chapters, sell things, move furniture, and prepare to leave.
Somewhere in that process, I met a mover named Ben—two hours, $80, and a realization that being treated well is love. I no longer had that, and I hadn't for a long time.
It sounds small, but it was a turning point for me: love should feel like peace, not effort.
Later, in therapy, I learned something important about myself—something many women struggle with:
I didn’t leave because I wasn’t strong.
I stayed because I didn’t yet believe I was worthy.
Worthy of consistency.
Worthy of kindness.
Worthy of someone who didn’t make me question myself.
Worthy of love that didn’t require me to shrink, over-give, or tolerate less than I deserved.
I am an over-giver. Anxiously attached. Resilient to a fault. And for most of my life, I’ve put the needs and wants of others before my own.
But worthiness is something you can repair. It’s something you can grow into .And it changes everything.
If you’re in that space right now—trying to decide whether to hold on, or finally let go—I hope this gives you courage.
Because sometimes strength isn’t staying.
Sometimes strength is finally remembering who you are…and knowing you deserve better.
-Beth Caldwell
Beth Caldwell is a popular self-help author from the United States and the founder of Circle for Women Worldwide.
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